When in Bali there’s a right way and a wrong way to do things. Know the right way and you’re on cloud 9 — epic food, beautiful women and perfect barrels. Go about things the wrong way and you’re hating life — stuck in traffic, walking on dry reef and sick with Bali belly. Marlon Gerber knows a thing or two about living the good life on Bali. The Kuta local and former Indonesian Tour champ can always be found hooking into the best waves on the island by day and out with a lovely creature hooked on his arm by night. So when Marlon showed up at Keramas for some cameo shredding on opening day of The Factory, we picked his brain for some sage do and don’t advice to make sure we spent our time in Bali crushing it instead of being crushed. Here’s Marlon:Photo: Scotty Hammonds
– Climb Mt. Agung. It’s the highest volcano in Bali at 3,200 meters above sea level. Mental view.
– Eat and/or hang out at the Balcony Restaurant above Un’s hotel. This is the other restaurant that my family has in Kuta. It’s got more of surf-vibe, but also a good variety of food. (The meat skewers and the burgers are top hits.)
– Eat at Warung Made Seminyak; trust me, just do it.
– Check out the monkey forest in Ubud, 45-min inland. But watch out for your glasses, phone and wallet. Those monkeys have sticky fingers.
– Check out the hanging gardens in Ubud, seriously a breath taking view. (The Four Seasons there has the best view, though.)
– If it’s flat, check out the Bali Wake Park. Verrrry fun. Hamas, the local pro, will give you tips and have you doing grabs and flips in one afternoon.
– Go to Single Fin at Uluwatu for Sunday Sessions. Amazing view, and a lot of girls. Tip: The parking lot outside is actually the best place to meet them. Especially ones who are stranded and need a ride back into town.
– Go home with a lady-boy. Do whatever you gotta do to check… Unless you’re into that sort of thing.
– Order drinks at the night clubs. Good chance it’s fake alcohol and you’ll wake up with a three-day hangover. Just drink Bintang; at least you know what you’re drinking.
– Wear reef booties at high tide. You might as well wear a sign saying “burn me.”
– Ride motorbikes if you don’t have any riding experience. This isn’t the place to learn. People crash and burn by the minute over here. Get a transport guy and relax in traffic.
– Ignore your tide chart. It’s all about the tides here. One hour can mean the difference between perfect waves, getting sucked out to sea, or slammed on dry reef.
– Bother dawn patrolling the Bukit. It’s almost always got a case of morning sickness. Better to sleep in and catch it once the trades start grooming the waves around 10 a.m.
– Drop in on Raymond at Halfway. (But I sometimes break this rule)