Surf: 5 feet and rising, due west with light trades
Events held: Women’s Round One through quarters
Nature’s call: Pride comes before a fall
Predicted: A steady rise in wickednessAs usual, Kieren Perrow was up before first light. From the boat dock, the surf was hard to distinguish between the flat lagoon and chalky, gray horizon. Kieren’s mate, Mick Lowe, stood beside him shirtless and hairy, his eyes glazed in grog. “Looks a little bigger than yesterday,” he said with a big, bear-like yawn.Word was that the women, the tour boys’ supposed pesky sister, would be on today. So, after a few moments of deliberation, KP and Lowey packed the small-wave shooters in the boat and shot out to have a look.Please note: we’re only preparing you for what happened next.You see, upon arriving at the reef, our boys had found it not much like the day before at all. To the contrary, thick, overhead brick-house barrels poured through. Early-bird Occ was already out showing how it’s done. The two chargers couldn’t escape the boat quick enough.Upon closer inspection, a few things about today’s session stuck out. One became apparent when the week’s first trustworthy “media” set pushed its way through the crowd. It’s called a “media” set for one simple reason: when compared to Laird or any other Herculean nonsense we’ve got you hooked on, these waves were hardly worth a postage stamp in Gulf Coast notes. But, as your in-the-trenches reporter, please take my word for it: you have no idea.

Kieren Perrow, on the other hand, does. West-swell Teahupo’o is a wave with utter disregard for human safety. The reef here is perfectly suited for a south swell. The waves can drain themselves dry while depositing their rider merrily into the channel. But, on a west swell, there’s no escape — which brings us back to that safety issue. And Kieren Perrow? He’s a man with utter disregard for his own.”Oh, he’s a glutton for punishment,” said Phil Macca after yet another Perrow bomb drop.This had to been his fifth attempt, at least. To have a better gauge on the situation, think of it like this. The meat of the pack will wait patiently at the break’s reasonable takeoff spot for a clean, fun-if-not-heavy wave. Then, every so often, one will come in unlike the others. Instead, it’s a wave of wild uncertainty. A Pit and Pendulum affair of the surfing realm–it’s a wave swung wide from the west. And a wave that basically looks to be a reef-eating right closeout. In other words, the man is a bleeding animal. And that brings us to that next thing.